In conjunction with your own self-awareness, comes the need to bring your awareness to the environment around you. Today’s work environment wrought with lightening-fast change, complexity and never-ending demands, is a natural playing field for negative energy. To start, make a mental note of people and situations that trigger your negative feelings and thoughts. You may notice that the negative moods of a toxic person can be extremely pervasive and emotionally draining – the nervous energy, the anger at life and everyone in it, the sadness, complaints, clinginess, attention seeking, the gossips, the consistently negative viewpoint — these negative attitudes will suck the positive out of even the most up-beat and positive person!

For some, the best defense is to avoid the toxic people and/or situation, or at the very least to keep the encounter to a very minimum. But what if that is not an option? The first step is to consciously acknowledge that negativity is being (and will be) sent your way. The next step is to consciously refuse to allow the negativity into your mind. You might even want to create a personal signal to remind yourself throughout the encounter to keep deflecting the negative conversation and energy that’s beaming at you. Your personal signal might be pulling a piece of your hair, or digging your thumbnail into your palm, or flicking your wrist, or tapping somewhere on your opposite hand…..whatever the signal, it will be your conscious reminder that you must ward off the negative of the toxic person.

The one thing nobody can take away from you is the way you choose to respond to what others say and do. Your personal signal that reminds you to ward off the negative is your cue to choose an appropriate attitude and response to protect your positive space. Here are some suggestions:
1. Make light of the conversation and change the topic to one of optimism.
2. Change the focus to one that is solution oriented. Ask questions like “So what can you do to change that?” “How’s that working for you….what could you do different?”
3. Provide a kind word and support if the situation warrants. “Are you ok?” “What can I do to help?”
Don’t get drawn in to spend any more time that necessary with someone you have identified as toxic.

Then, consciously practice finding the positive and good in everyday interactions and in everything around you. Be thankful always in everything you do and for where you are at that moment … it could always be worse. The more time you spend in the positive, whether it’s time spent with highly positive people, or quiet moments of your own, the easier it will become for you to deflect the negative vibes that toxic people send out.

Acquiring the skill of Positive Presence is a slow and gentle process that begins with awareness. The more time you spend in the positive, the greater your capacity for achieving peak performance, for building and maintaining good relationships, and for experiencing good health.