All great relationships require constructive conflict and confrontation to grow and thrive.
Influential leaders orchestrate the culture in which people can be energized, engaged, and fully aware of their meaningful contributions to the enterprise. Much of the personal and organizational benefits of such a culture can be negated if we resist and fear constructive conflict and confrontation. The ability to overcome this fear can be achieved taking the following steps:
1. Reconnect with the mission of the organization. The stated purpose of the organization is to be of service to a great number of people, not to forward one group’s interests. When we avoid strategies (like constructive conflict and confrontation) that enable that mission to be fulfilled, we invite not only disruptions but also harm. For example, the collision of two 747 airplanes over the Canary Islands, the explosion of the space shuttle Challenger, and countless fatal medical errors that occurred because people who knew something was wrong did not speak up. When we reconnect with the primary meaning and purpose of our work, we can gain clarity, courage, and commitment. These ideals then drive us to pursue constructive conflict and confrontation, which help us make better decisions.
2. View conflict and confrontation as positive rather than negative. The key is to be intentional and deliberate. Generally, people’s mental model about conflict is set to “fight or flight” – that is, we run from it if we cannot fight it. When we stay to fight, we often (if not always) lose, so we do not bother. This mind-set prevents us from considering a third option – viewing conflict and confrontation as allies, not as enemies. When our mind regards conflict and confrontation as helpful, we create positive emotional reactions to both and gain positive, optimal outcomes as a result.
3. Get out of the way and let constructive conflict and confrontation do their job. According to Patrick Lencioni, the leader should enable their people to work out their own problems: “It is key that leaders demonstrate restraint when their people engage in confrontation, and allow resolution to occur naturally, as messy as it can get sometimes.” Kerry Patterson and colleagues suggest in their book Crucial Confrontations that constructive confrontation is essential to organizational relationships, growth, and prosperity, particularly when it involves people who are at different levels: “We really perked up when the person was about to confront a leader who was more powerful – say a supervisor going head to head with a vice president. And if the person had a reputation for being abusive, we couldn’t wait to see what happened.”
CORPORATE HARMONY is grateful to Dr. Michael E. Frisina for his contributions to this entry.
Catherine is the President and CEO of CORPORATE HARMONY, providing virtual solutions for leadership development and organizational culture change. Her leadership and coaching experience as a Project Manager in an ever-changing, fast moving technological organization with unrelenting demands drove her to the realization that a positive mindset and strength-building behaviors are essential for today’s complex and chaotic organizational systems. CORPORATE HARMONY’s virtual platform of programs, coaching and performance measurement, is an innovative online technology of tested proprietary content. The world-class content of CORPORATE HARMONY’s Positive Presence Program develops the skill of ‘Positive Presence’ and the necessary ‘Positive Presence Behaviour Competencies’ for maintaining a positive and energized mindset and increased performance in today’s complex work environment, and leading to a culture of collaboration and connection. Catherine’s vision for Corporate Harmony is to bring the skill of “Positive Presence” to the corporate world as it becomes more complex, ambiguous and chaotic. Catherine is uniquely positioned to impact organizations’ productivity and long term success, with her powerful vision of eliminating bad stress from every workplace around the globe, bringing purpose into the people equation to promote healthy, productive and meaningful work cultures and turn the tide on the neglect of mental health on a global scale. Catherine is author of the book: “CORPORATE HARMONY – The Performance Link for Today’s Modern Organization” Catherine can be reached at: Catherine.Osborne@corporateharmony.ca or go to ‘contact us’ on our website www.corporateharmony.ca. Catherine is available for consultation, and can be reached by 519-695-3407.